How to Blow and Perfectly Good Introduction?!

I routinely get requests from my clients to connect them with inside contacts with companies, where they want to pursue new opportunities. I have an extensive contact list on my LinkedIn Profile and many of these contacts are my clients. So, when one client requests an introduction to someone at a company they want to pursue, I make sure that the connection is relevant to their targeting (e.g., Ill introduce a VP of Marketing to someone looking for a Product Marketing role in their company, etc.). Because I maintain ongoing relationships with my clients the response rate to my Introduction requests is high and Id like to keep it that way and protect my brand.

Sometimes, though, this does not work out so well. In a recent case of a senior-level manager, who wanted to be introduced to my clientJimin a company she was targeting, I followed up with her after a few weeks asking if he had heard from Jim at ABC. She said, no and went on to say that she had followed up many times after my LinkedIn Intro to him to no avail. Curious, I asked her to send me the first follow-up email she had sent to Jim, just a day after my introduction. Here is a modified version of that email (the version is modified to protect the innocent, but to maintain its original spirit and to make a point):

Jim,

Im so glad that Dilip introduced me to you through LinkedIn. I am very interested in the Controller job and I have many questions about that job and the company. Since you do not directly work in Finance, I wonder if you can research the following and meet me for lunch at your earliest convenience; this job has been posted for over three weeks now:

1. Why are they looking for a Controller since I see they already have one?
2. I recently read that there is an ongoing SEC investigation about insider trading by some C-level executives. Is this going to create a problem for me?
3. What insights can you give me about the incumbent and why is she being replaced?
4. What is her boss (CFO) like? I have heard some negative things about him in the media. Are they true?
5. I have a small baby and I prefer to telecommute at least two days a week. Can you help me with this arrangement?
6. I have many other questions that I want to bring up after we meet, so Ill hold them off for now. Dilip has told me how busy you are and how limited your time is, so I am going to stop here.

Please let me know where and when we can meet for lunch!

After I read this email, I was dumbfounded and was not surprised why Jim not only not respond to her, but ignored her subsequent follow-up requests as well. After recoiling from this experience, I immediately sent an email to Jim asking for his forgiveness for this transgression and promising him that Id do something to prevent this from happening again with my future introductions to him and to others (now I have introduction guidelines for all my clients).

So, what should have my client done to follow-up properly, so that she had a better chance of getting Jim to respond to my request and her need? Here is an alternate follow-up email script that has a better chance of a response from Jim. I am sure that there are other equally tenable scripts:

Jim,

I am glad that Dilip forwarded you my Introduction request. Thanks, too, for connecting with me on LinkedIn. As I mentioned in my request to him I am looking to pursue the Controller opening at ABC. Since you have been at ABC for a few years and work closely with the Finance department I thought you might be able to give me some general insights about the job and what it would take for me to qualify for it. I meet all the job requirements described in the posting. If there is a referral bonus for this position Id certainly be interested in your claiming it. I know how busy you are, so I promise you not to take more than just a few minutes of your time on the phone. If you have any other ways we can connect Id be happy to respond, too.

Thanks again!

With this message of follow-up I cannot guarantee that Jim would respond in kind, but I can guarantee that Jim or anyone else definitely would not respond to the original follow-up note my had client sent. In that single thoughtless message my client not only scuttled her chances for a positive response from Jim, she also compromised my relationship with him. In the revised message there is a referral bonus hook to Jim, which can be the tipping point. Additionally, respecting a persons time and acknowledging their effort involved even to respond to you also is a plus. Her original follow-up sounds too peremptory, self-centered, and thoughtless.

In rare cases those being introduced are blind to the social norms of what it takes to get people to respond to what is important to them they must first apply the Golden Rule (would you respond to a total stranger if they made such a demanding and inconsiderate request?). Without understanding the basic human dynamic of how and why people respond and what it takes to get what you are looking for from strangers, getting what you want can be a tough battle.

Good luck!

About Author

Dilip has distinguished himself as LinkedIn’s #1 career coach from among a global pool of over 1,000 peers ever since LinkedIn started ranking them professionally (LinkedIn selected 23 categories of professionals for this ranking and published this ranking from 2006 until 2012). Having worked with over 6,000 clients from all walks of professions and having worked with nearly the entire spectrum of age groups—from high-school graduates about to enter college to those in their 70s, not knowing what to do with their retirement—Dilip has developed a unique approach to bringing meaning to their professional and personal lives. Dilip’s professional success lies in his ability to codify what he has learned in his own varied life (he has changed careers four times and is currently in his fifth) and from those of his clients, and to apply the essence of that learning to each coaching situation. After getting his B.Tech. (Honors) from IIT-Bombay and Master’s in electrical engineering(MSEE) from Stanford University, Dilip worked at various organizations, starting as an individual contributor and then progressing to head an engineering organization of a division of a high-tech company, with $2B in sales, in California’s Silicon Valley. His current interest in coaching resulted from his career experiences spanning nearly four decades, at four very diverse organizations–and industries, including a major conglomerate in India, and from what it takes to re-invent oneself time and again, especially after a lay-off and with constraints that are beyond your control. During the 45-plus years since his graduation, Dilip has reinvented himself time and again to explore new career horizons. When he left the corporate world, as head of engineering of a technology company, he started his own technology consulting business, helping high-tech and biotech companies streamline their product development processes. Dilip’s third career was working as a marketing consultant helping Fortune-500 companies dramatically improve their sales, based on a novel concept. It is during this work that Dilip realized that the greatest challenge most corporations face is available leadership resources and effectiveness; too many followers looking up to rudderless leadership. Dilip then decided to work with corporations helping them understand the leadership process and how to increase leadership effectiveness at every level. Soon afterwards, when the job-market tanked in Silicon Valley in 2001, Dilip changed his career track yet again and decided to work initially with many high-tech refugees, who wanted expert guidance in their reinvention and reemployment. Quickly, Dilip expanded his practice to help professionals from all walks of life. Now in his fifth career, Dilip works with professionals in the Silicon Valley and around the world helping with reinvention to get their dream jobs or vocations. As a career counselor and life coach, Dilip’s focus has been career transitions for professionals at all levels and engaging them in a purposeful pursuit. Working with them, he has developed many groundbreaking approaches to career transition that are now published in five books, his weekly blogs, and hundreds of articles. He has worked with those looking for a change in their careers–re-invention–and jobs at levels ranging from CEOs to hospital orderlies. He has developed numerous seminars and workshops to complement his individual coaching for helping others with making career and life transitions. Dilip’s central theme in his practice is to help clients discover their latent genius and then build a value proposition around it to articulate a strong verbal brand. Throughout this journey, Dilip has come up with many groundbreaking practices such as an Inductive Résumé and the Genius Extraction Tool. Dilip owns two patents, has two publications in the Harvard Business Review and has led a CEO roundtable for Chief Executive on Customer Loyalty. Both Amazon and B&N list numerous reviews on his five books. Dilip is also listed in Who’s Who, has appeared several times on CNN Headline News/Comcast Local Edition, as well as in the San Francisco Chronicle in its career columns. Dilip is a contributing writer to several publications. Dilip is a sought-after speaker at public and private forums on jobs, careers, leadership challenges, and how to be an effective leader.

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